Post by Greg C. on Oct 17, 2007 12:52:44 GMT -5
Sorry for all the asterisks but I copied this from an email. Enjoy!
In the beginning, *God* created the Heavens and the Earth and populated the
Earth with Broccoli, Cauliflower and Spinach, *green* and *yellow* and *red*
* *Vegetables of all kinds, so Man and Woman would live Long and Healthy
Lives.
~
Then using *God's* great gifts, *Satan* created *Ben* and *Jerry's *Ice
Cream and Krispy Creme Donuts. And *Satan* said, "You want *chocolate* with
that?" And Man said, "Yes!" and Woman said, "and as long as you're at it,
add some sprinkles." And they gained *10* pounds. *And **Satan** smiled*.
~
*And God created the healthful Yogurt that Woman might keep the Figure** **that
Man found so fair.*
*~*
And *Satan* brought forth white flour from the wheat, and sugar from the
cane and combined them. And Woman went from size *6* to size *14*.
~
*So God said, "Try my fresh green salad." *
*~*
And *Satan* presented *Thousand-Island Dressing*, buttery croutons and
garlic toast on the side. And Man and Woman unfastened their belts following
the repast.
~
*God then said, "I have sent you heart healthy vegetables, and olive oil in
which to cook them."*
~
And *Satan* brought forth deep fried fish and chicken-fried steak so big it
needed its own platter. And Man gained more weight and his cholesterol went
through the roof.
~
*So God then created a light, fluffy white cake, named it "**Angel Food Cake
**," and said, "It is good."*
*~*
*Satan* then created chocolate cake and named it *"Devil's Food."*
~
*God then brought forth running shoes so that His children might lose those
extra pounds.*
~
And *Satan* gave cable TV with
a remote control so Man would not have to toil changing the channels. And
Man and Woman laughed and cried before the flickering blue light and gained
pounds.
~
*Then God brought forth the Potato, naturally low in fat and brimming with
nutrition*.
~
And *Satan* peeled off the healthful skin and sliced the starchy center into
chips and deep-fried them. *And Man gained pounds.
~*
*God then gave lean beef so that Man might consume fewer calories and still
satisfy his appetite. *
*~*
And *Satan* created McDonald's
and its 99-cent double Cheeseburger. Then said, "You want fries with that?"
And Man replied, *"Yes!* *And super size them!"* And *Satan* said, *"It is
good." *
*~*
*And Man Went Into Cardiac Arrest.*
~
*God Sighed and Created
Quadruple Bypass Surgery*.
~
*Then **Satan **Created **HMOs. *
In the beginning, *God* created the Heavens and the Earth and populated the
Earth with Broccoli, Cauliflower and Spinach, *green* and *yellow* and *red*
* *Vegetables of all kinds, so Man and Woman would live Long and Healthy
Lives.
~
Then using *God's* great gifts, *Satan* created *Ben* and *Jerry's *Ice
Cream and Krispy Creme Donuts. And *Satan* said, "You want *chocolate* with
that?" And Man said, "Yes!" and Woman said, "and as long as you're at it,
add some sprinkles." And they gained *10* pounds. *And **Satan** smiled*.
~
*And God created the healthful Yogurt that Woman might keep the Figure** **that
Man found so fair.*
*~*
And *Satan* brought forth white flour from the wheat, and sugar from the
cane and combined them. And Woman went from size *6* to size *14*.
~
*So God said, "Try my fresh green salad." *
*~*
And *Satan* presented *Thousand-Island Dressing*, buttery croutons and
garlic toast on the side. And Man and Woman unfastened their belts following
the repast.
~
*God then said, "I have sent you heart healthy vegetables, and olive oil in
which to cook them."*
~
And *Satan* brought forth deep fried fish and chicken-fried steak so big it
needed its own platter. And Man gained more weight and his cholesterol went
through the roof.
~
*So God then created a light, fluffy white cake, named it "**Angel Food Cake
**," and said, "It is good."*
*~*
*Satan* then created chocolate cake and named it *"Devil's Food."*
~
*God then brought forth running shoes so that His children might lose those
extra pounds.*
~
And *Satan* gave cable TV with
a remote control so Man would not have to toil changing the channels. And
Man and Woman laughed and cried before the flickering blue light and gained
pounds.
~
*Then God brought forth the Potato, naturally low in fat and brimming with
nutrition*.
~
And *Satan* peeled off the healthful skin and sliced the starchy center into
chips and deep-fried them. *And Man gained pounds.
~*
*God then gave lean beef so that Man might consume fewer calories and still
satisfy his appetite. *
*~*
And *Satan* created McDonald's
and its 99-cent double Cheeseburger. Then said, "You want fries with that?"
And Man replied, *"Yes!* *And super size them!"* And *Satan* said, *"It is
good." *
*~*
*And Man Went Into Cardiac Arrest.*
~
*God Sighed and Created
Quadruple Bypass Surgery*.
~
*Then **Satan **Created **HMOs. *
